if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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