so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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