No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
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I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
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I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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