Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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