I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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