What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize
