I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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