Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
