No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
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so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
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Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.