Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage