$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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