I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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