In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.