Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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