I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
