its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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