their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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