Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
