on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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