6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
