i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize