Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
