the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
