And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
