Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
im six kinds of drunk right now
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
