What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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