Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize