I'm eating all of the evidence.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize