wrigley field is MILF paradise
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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