Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize