So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
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Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize