I feel like abortions should bother me more
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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