You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
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