I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Randomize