the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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