So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
25 Adults Reveal The Most Embarrassing Stories From When They Were Kids
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.