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I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
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