so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
two words: eviction party
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
