I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
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Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
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Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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