I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize