he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
