she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
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