thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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