I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
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