i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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