i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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