Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
