Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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