He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
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please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
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No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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