People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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