school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
