What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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