I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
